Out of Bounds: Thank you, moms! By Jake Linger
It is unfathomable to me that we are already talking about Mother's Day. I still haven't paid off my Christmas debt - for 2005!
How nice is it that the weather has been very spring-like and everyone seems to be in a great mood? We are in the midst of our most important presidential election in our history and, even though the economy has temporarily tanked, I think good times are ahead, especially in sports.
An e-mail was sent to me this week asking why I have not been as hard on Roger Clemens as I apparently was on Barry Bonds during his time in the scandalous sun. Here is the thing. I actually like Bonds as a baseball player. It is hard not to like the guy. In fact, even with litigation clouds looming over his head regarding tax evasion and steroid use, there are major league teams still interested in perhaps signing Bonds this season.
On the flip side, I despise Clemens and I always have. Sometimes there is one personality, whether it be an athlete, actor or co-worker, that irritates you to the core of your very existence. Clemens happens to fall in that category for me. I believe he is arrogant and pompous and has a very unhealthy superiority complex.
It sounds like you just described yourself, Ace!
Fair enough, but I can assure my readers that the only performance enhancer I have ever used is a thesaurus. In fact, Aunt Agatha is still not letting me live down my gobbledygook comments of months ago.
As far as the readers' concerns regarding Clemens-Bonds go, the latter admitted to using steroids in the form of the cream and/or the clear. Granted, he claims still that he unknowingly took steroids. Still I find no shame in scolding Bonds because athletes who make millions of dollars each year should be exactly sure of what is going into their bodies. Sorry. A NASCAR driver cannot blame the pit crew for replacing his or her motor oil with egg yolk when it should be the driver's responsibility to know everything about the vehicle. The same can be said for all athletes. (For the record, I am not saying that car drivers are athletes. They are actually two rungs behind Kentucky Derby winner Barbaro and Evil Knievel.)
Clemens on the other hand is about as trustworthy as trying on a glove at a murder trial. His personal trainer has gone before Congress and stated that the 300-plus-game winner has used performance enhancers. In some very cryptic way, Clemens has also admitted to having an extramarital affair with country singer Mindy McCready. (For the record, I am not saying that country artists are singers. They are actually two rungs behind - well, Barbaro and Evil Knievel.)
Clemens will also be in trouble for lying under oath to Congress. There has to be a point where a guy realizes that the jig is up. Mr. Clemens, the jig is up. Even Mike Vick knew when to say when.
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I would like to offer my congratulations to each of the Bowie High spring athletics teams that performed extremely well this year. The varsity baseball and softball teams are, as usual, on a direct path to face Eleanor Roosevelt for their respective county titles. Each of the coaches and athletes - and even a few of the parents - are quality people and I am happy to have met all that I have so far. I hope every senior this season gets a taste of the playoffs and enjoys every last second of high school. Because, before you know it, August will be here and you guys and girls will be sharing a dorm room with some strange kid from Kentucky who strums a guitar and feels the need to tell you their life story - once a day! Enjoy what is left of your time at Bowie High.
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Momma mia! Mother's Day is this weekend and I would like to extend my heartfelt best wishes to each of the moms in Bowie, Mitchellville and Glenn Dale. There are so many mothers in this area that sacrifice time and money to make sure that their youth athletes have the opportunity to compete and enjoy what the city of Bowie has to offer. Mothers, you are not forgotten.
Some of you coach your kids, some of you are charged with the responsibility of making sure the local press (that's me) receives information for Youth Sports and Sports Briefs. Some of you simply drive the neighborhood kids to practice, and some raise money for the numerous local sports organizations. On behalf of myself, who would not always be able to pump out four pages of athletics goodness each week without you ladies, I thank you and wish you the best Mother's Day you could possibly have.
And only because I can, I would like to wish my mom Mary Ann, as well as my sister Ashley, a happy Mother's Day.
